Have you heard of the saying “paralysis by analysis”? If so, then you probably know what I’m talking about.
Sometimes, we want something so bad, that we switch to “analytic mode” and we obsess and ruminate over every little thing that could be having an influence over the outcome we are wanting to achieve. Some of us will even go one step further and start working our way through a list of things to try to help to improve or hurry along the situation.
For example, I’ve been at the point where I would seriously consider bathing in goats' blood on full moon whilst drinking pond water – if someone told me that might help with bringing my baby earth side!
The problem with this kind of thinking is that it’s just a form of distraction. Distraction from the fact that we are stuck in our heads and not allowing ourselves to feel in our heart space. (Babies and fertility are 100% heart not head).
Scientists are just starting to understand and recognize that our hearts have almost half a million neurons, that can sense, feel, learn and remember, just like our brains!
We are used to hearing that our brains help us to process emptions, thoughts, feelings, sensations, movements etc, but we don’t hear much about the fact that our hearts are just as important in the processing of these things - Our hearts can literally “feel” what we think only our brains can process. (Our gut has neurons and feelings too – but that’s for another blog).
For many women, fertility journeys are not easy. They involve a lot of soul searching, medical interventions and deep feelings of pain, disappointment and hurt. Many lose hope and self-esteem becomes non-existent. In these times, we often switch to our heads (Brains) so that we can ‘get on with life’ and we suppress our feelings because they can be intense and uncomfortable to “feel”.
When we distract ourselves from what we are truly feeling, we create blocks. We block the flow of energy, and we block the flow of our own progress and healing.
We do this because we live in a world where we are taught that showing our feelings is weak, being emotional is ‘weak’, being vulnerable is weak and what this has basically done over the years, is program women to think that being feminine is weak.
The opposite of feminine is masculine and in a world where physical war is not acceptable, dominance is shown through intellect and analysis. Women who are not feeling supported in their feminine, tend to go into their heads and use analysis to tame their feelings and intuition - because this is what society accepts.
SO, what does this have to do with babies and fertility??
Everything! Fertility is all about flow, feminine flow. I’m not suggesting that letting emotions run wild is the answer, what I AM saying is that there is value in those little feelings that pop up and niggle at us.
There are stories and beliefs to explore each time we feel something. Some of these feeling (when explored) will unlock parts of yourself that you didn’t even know existed and once we are conscious of these stories and beliefs, we can start to consider whether it’s time to embrace them or change them!
So how can you get out of your head and spend time listening to your heart?
1. Spend some time in nature
2. Start a journal
3. Tune out with some restorative yoga
Pop a comment in the feedback section below to let me know how you’re learning to spend time with your heart, rather than your head!
Contact me for a one-on-one support session to explore this in more detail!
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